Strap-On Guide for Curious Beginners: What It Is, Why It’s Fun, and How to Use One

Not that long ago, the idea of strap-on sex was something most people whispered about—if they talked about it at all. It was seen as something “niche,” like it only belonged to a certain kind of person or couple. But things are changing fast.

These days, strap-ons are in the spotlight. They’re in TV shows, podcasts, even memes. More people are getting curious, especially couples who want to explore new roles, new sensations, or just shake things up in the bedroom.

So, if you’ve been wondering about strap-ons—what they are, how they work, and whether you might enjoy one—you’re in the right place. This beginner-friendly guide explains it all in plain English, with no shame, no pressure, and a lot of honest info.

🌟 What Is a Strap-On?

At its core, a strap-on is a toy that lets one person wear a dildo using a harness or belt. The wearer can then use it to penetrate a partner during sex. Simple, right?

Most strap-on kits come with two main parts:

  1. A harness or strap that fits around the hips and thighs.

  2. A dildo that attaches to the harness using an O-ring or similar connector.

There are also strapless strap-ons, where one end goes inside the wearer and the other penetrates their partner—no harness needed. But for beginners, harness kits are usually the easiest place to start.

👩❤️👩 Who Are Strap-Ons For?

Strap-ons are for anyone who wants to try something different—regardless of gender or sexual orientation.

  • Queer couples use strap-ons to enjoy penetrative sex.

  • Straight couples may use them for pegging (when the woman wears the strap-on and penetrates her male partner).

  • Anyone with erectile issues may use a strap-on to stay in control.

  • Couples exploring power play or role reversal love the mental and emotional thrill.

There’s no “right” or “wrong” reason to use a strap-on. It’s all about fun, pleasure, and mutual curiosity.

🔍 How to Choose a Strap-On

Before you jump into play, it helps to find the right gear. Not all strap-ons feel or function the same. Here's what to consider:

  • Size: For beginners, 5–7 inches is a great starting point.

  • Material: Silicone is smooth and body-safe. Rubber is softer and more flexible.

  • Harness type: Some harnesses use adjustable straps; others are like underwear or boxer-briefs.

  • Attachment: Most dildos connect with an O-ring, but check if your dildo and harness match.

  • Extras: Vibrations, suction cups, or dual-ended options can enhance the experience.

📊 Strap-On Product Comparison Guide

Here’s a breakdown of beginner to advanced strap-on kits and accessories from Playmate Adult Store. This chart can help you pick the perfect fit based on size, features, and comfort level:

Product Best For Dildo Size Harness Included? Vibration Notes
Strap-On Fantasy Vibrator Beginners & couples Medium A vibrating kit for shared pleasure.
Dildo 10.2" Strap-On Bundle Size lovers XL For those who want length and intensity.
7.8" Dildo Strap-On Belt Bundle Classic users Medium Balanced size for regular play.
8" Dildo Strap-On Bundle Versatile use Medium-Large A solid pick with a sturdy harness.
Huge 12.2" Dildo Strap-On Bundle Advanced users XXL For experienced users who want a challenge.
Dildo + Strap-On Belt Bundle First-time users Small-Medium A simple and comfy entry-level kit.
Strap-On Pleasures Dildo Belt Everyday comfort Medium Well-fitted, adjustable belt-style harness.
Strap-On Joy Dildo Accessory option Medium Use with your favorite harness.
Strap-On Harness (Garment Only) Custom setups N/A Choose your own dildo for a perfect match.
Strap-On Play Double Dildo Female Harness Mutual pleasure Dual Great for stimulating both partners.
Strap-On Delight Double Dildo Female Harness Shared sensation Dual Another great dual-option for couples.

 

🧠 How to Use a Strap-On (Step-by-Step)

  1. Choose your harness and dildo
    Make sure they’re compatible (check the base size and O-ring fit).

  2. Insert the dildo into the harness
    Do this before putting the harness on—much easier.

  3. Put on the harness and adjust straps
    It should feel snug but not tight. Practice walking or squatting to test comfort.

  4. Use water-based lube
    This makes everything smoother—especially for anal play.

  5. Start slow and communicate
    The wearer won’t feel penetration the same way, so verbal feedback is key.

  6. Try different positions
    Doggy, spooning, on-top, and face-to-face are all great places to start.

❓ FAQ: Strap-Ons for First-Timers

Q1: Does wearing a strap-on feel good for the wearer?
Not always physically (unless it’s vibrating or strapless), but seeing your partner’s pleasure is a big turn-on.

Q2: Is it weird to use one if I’m straight?
Not at all. Strap-on sex isn’t about orientation—it’s about sensation. Plenty of straight couples enjoy it!

Q3: How do I clean it?
Use warm water and toy cleaner or mild soap for the dildo. Wipe down the harness or follow the washing instructions.

Q4: Can you use a strap-on during vaginal or anal sex?
Yes to both! Just be sure to use the right lube and take it slow—especially for anal.

Q5: Where can I find more strap-on gear?
Browse Playmate’s full strap-on collection here. They have everything from beginner bundles to advanced harnesses and accessories.

Final Thoughts

If you’ve been curious about strap-ons, I say go for it. You don’t need to be an expert. You don’t need to be a certain “type” of person. You just need to be open, respectful, and ready to learn what feels good.

Strap-ons aren’t just about penetration. They’re about power, pleasure, playfulness, and sometimes, letting go.

So buckle up. Try something bold. You might love what you discover.

👉 Explore all strap-on gear at Playmate Adult Store