The Best Sex Toys for Spicing Up the Bedroom

If you are buying your first sex toy, the choice can feel overwhelming, but it does not need to be. The best beginner toys are simple, affordable and easy to use, and most cost less than a nice dinner out. This guide rounds up the best sex toys for beginners in New Zealand, sorted by who they suit, so you can find an easy starting point without the guesswork. Every pick is a genuine favourite, and each links to a deeper guide if you want to read more.

What makes a good first toy

Three things make a toy beginner friendly. It should be simple to use, with straightforward controls rather than a dozen settings. It should be affordable, so there is no pressure if it turns out not to be your thing. And it should be made from body safe materials like silicone or ABS plastic. Beyond that, pick whatever appeals most. There is no wrong first choice, and curiosity is the only qualification you need. It also helps to think about how and where you will use it, since a quiet, rechargeable toy suits a shared home, while something small and discreet is easy to store and travel with.

Best beginner toys for her

Most women start with a small external toy, because that is where a lot of pleasure comes from. A simple Lady Vibe Clitoral Vibrator or a discreet Bullet Vibrator is an easy, affordable first step. When you are ready for internal and external stimulation together, a rabbit vibrator is the natural next toy. For more, read our guide to sex toys for women and our guide to buzzy versus rumbly vibrations.

Best beginner toys for him

For men, a masturbator or stroker is the most popular first toy, giving a new feel for solo play at every budget. The Busy Vibrating Masturbator is an easy place to start. A cock ring is another cheap, simple introduction, and something like the Fun-Sized Cock Ring costs very little to try. Our guide to male sex toys maps out the whole range, and our cock rings guide covers rings in detail.

Best beginner toys for couples

Shared toys are a lovely, low pressure way to try something new together. A vibrating cock ring works during sex so both of you feel it, and a small bullet can be used together during foreplay. Choosing something as a couple, with both of you having a say, is half the fun and takes the pressure off one person to lead. If you are exploring together for the first time, keep it simple and playful rather than ambitious. A relaxed conversation about what you are each curious about, with no pressure to act on any of it straight away, is often the best place to begin.

Do not forget the lube

If you buy one thing alongside your first toy, make it a good water based lubricant like Wet Stuff Gold. It makes external play smoother and internal play far more comfortable, it is body safe, and it will not damage silicone toys. It is the cheapest upgrade you can make to any toy, and most people wish they had started using it sooner.

Easy picks under $50

There is no wrong reason to be curious

Plenty of people put off buying a first toy because they feel they need a reason, or worry about what it says about them. The truth is much simpler. Toys are for anyone who is curious, single or partnered, of any age over eighteen, and at any level of experience. Using one does not mean anything is missing, and it is not a substitute for a partner. It is just a way to feel good and to understand your own body a little better. Once you reframe it as ordinary rather than daring, the whole thing feels a lot more relaxed.

What to avoid as a beginner

A few simple missteps can put people off early, and they are easy to sidestep. Do not start too big or too advanced, since a modest, simple toy is far more likely to become a favourite than an ambitious one that intimidates you. Avoid cheap toys of unknown material with a strong chemical smell, and stick to body safe silicone or ABS plastic. Do not skip the lubricant, because it makes a bigger difference than any feature. And do not feel you have to rush, since taking your time is the point rather than a delay.

How to choose between them

Still torn? Go with the toy for the kind of sensation you are most curious about. If you want to explore your own body gently, a small external vibrator is perfect. If you want to add something to sex you already enjoy, a cock ring or a shared toy is ideal. If solo play is the goal for him, a masturbator is the classic. You really cannot get it wrong, and many people build up a small collection over time as they learn what they like.

Caring for your first toy

Looking after a toy is simple and keeps it hygienic for years. Wash it with warm water and a mild toy cleaner before and after use, dry it fully, and store it somewhere cool and dry. Use only water based lubricant with silicone toys, keep water away from charging ports, and check the label for anything marked waterproof. A little care goes a long way.

Building a collection over time

Most people do not buy everything at once, and there is no need to. The usual path is to start with one toy that appeals, add a lubricant, and see how you find it. Once you know what kind of sensation you enjoy, you can add a second toy from a different category, then perhaps something to share with a partner. Buying this way keeps the cost manageable and means every toy you own is one you actually reach for. There is no finish line here, just a gradual, enjoyable process of learning what works for you.

Shopping with confidence

Buying online takes the awkwardness out of it completely. You can browse in private, read honest descriptions and reviews, compare options and change your mind as often as you like, all without anyone watching. Orders arrive in plain, unmarked packaging with nothing on the outside to reveal what is inside. That privacy is exactly what makes it easy to try something you were always a little curious about, on your own terms and in your own time.

Ready to start

Browse the best sellers to see what other New Zealanders love, or dig into the category that interests you most through the guides above, including rabbit vibrators and gentle anal play. Whatever you choose, it ships in plain, discreet packaging, so you can start exploring with confidence and complete privacy.